Vovochka Anecdotes

A tearful teacher comes running to the school principal: “I can’t… I can’t work anymore at 6 “B“! They smoke and swear. And Vovochka even promised to rape me today!
– Well, if this one promised, he will definitely do it!..

Biology lesson. Marvanna asks Vovochka: “Vova.” tell me how to distinguish a bull from a cow. Vovka:
– When you milk a bull, he smiles!

Mom leaves on a business trip and says goodbye to the children: “Children, I will be gone for a long time.” What should I bring you as a gift? Boy or girl? Vovochka takes her sister and goes into the room for a meeting. They come out with downcast eyes and approach their mother: “Mommy, we love you very much, we don’t need a gift, it’s better to have an abortion.”

1965, math lesson, topic: percentages. Marya Ivanovna:
– So who can tell me what the percentage of excellent students in our class is? A hand reaches out from the back desk.
– Come on, Vovochka!
– 146%
– Yes-ahh, Churov, it’s good that you don’t work for the Central Election Commission!

Vovochka spies at her parents through the keyhole at night and says philosophically: “And these people forbid me to pick my nose with my finger…

Mom calls her little son from the balcony: “Vovochka!” It’s time to go home!
– Mom, can I have a little more?
– Well, okay, a little bit at a time, and then go straight home!

– Vovochka, what did dad say when he fell down the stairs?
– Is it possible to repeat obscene words?
– Of course not.
– Then nothing.

– Who is your father?
– the teacher asks Vovochka.
– Comrade Stalin!
– Who is your mother?
– Soviet Motherland! -What do you want to become?
– An orphan!

Vovochka comes from school. His father asks him: “Did they call you today?”
– Yes, they will call you tomorrow.