Vovochka Anecdotes

A tear-stained teacher comes running to the director and says: “That’s it, I can’t work at 6 “G” anymore.” They swear, fight, disrupt classes. Director:
– Well, calm down. Teacher:
– And also, Vovochka promised to rape me! Director:
– Well, well, if he promised it, he will definitely do it.

Vovochka says to her mother: “Mom, who is my dad?”
– Father Frost .
– How is this?
– Vovochka is surprised.
– How, how… he came at night, gave a gift and no one saw him again.

– Mashenka, where have you been all night?!
– Mom asks.
– At Vovochka’s…
– But I forbade you to walk with him!
– We didn’t even go for a walk…

Start of the lesson. Teacher:
– Yes, children! What should I ask now? Vovochka:
– Ask a jerk!

The teacher asks little Vovochka: “What is your jacket and what is it made of?”
– Made of cloth.
– Right; And what is the cloth made from?
– Made of wool!
– Well done! Who gives us wool?
– Sheep .
– Good girl! So what animal gave you your jacket?
– Dad

The teacher gave a topic for the essay:
– Write a story using the names of all the days of the week. Vovochka wrote: “Dad went hunting on Sunday.” He brought such a huge hare that we ate it on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and still had some left for Saturday.

Vovochka politely entered the classroom. Mary Ivanna was alone. He took off his pants and lifted Mary Ivanna’s skirt.
– Vovochka, stop it right now!
– What is it? I asked you from the doorway: “Can I come in?” And you answered: “Yes, please!”

Mom and Dad were impatient. They put Vovochka on the window. Mom:
– Vovochka, count the soldiers, and we’ll buy you a sister and give you a chocolate for each soldier. “One, two… three… four,” he looks, a whole company of soldiers is coming.
– Oh, Mommy, your little sister will cost you dearly.

Vovochka tugs at a passerby’s cloak: “Uncle, weren’t you the one who dropped the gold coin here?” He pats his pockets: “Yes, it must be me.” Well, give it here!
– I don’t have one, I just asked.
– Why? “Yes, along with your chervonets there should already be more than twenty thousand lying around here!”