Vovochka Anecdotes

– Vovochka! Get away from the tiger cage now! “Don’t be afraid, mom, I won’t do anything to them!”

A little girl comes running to her kindergarten teacher, all in tears.
– What’s happened? Who offended you?!
– Vovochka!
– How? “He said that mothers-in-law should be killed in childhood!”

Vovochka tells his desk neighbor: “Yesterday my father spanked me twice.”
– For what?
– The first time was when I showed him the diary. And there are such marks, such notes! And the second was when he realized that it was his old diary.

Vovochka:
– Mom, can I go and pee? Mom: -Have you done your homework?

A policeman to Vovochka, who was lost in a store: “Why are you crying?”
– I lost my parents!
– What are their names?
– Sweetie and Kitty.

Little Vovochka runs out to meet Santa Claus:
– Grandfather Frost, Grandfather Frost, did you bring me a gift?
– Brought it, brought it!.. Bring the corkscrew!

Vovochka comes home with a girl and says: “Mom, dad, this is my future wife Kozenka, she is 8 months pregnant.” Mom and dad are shocked. Vovochka:
– Just kidding. Her name is Masha.

Vovochka came to physical education class, and there was a new teacher
– such a two-meter strong man…
– Hello, children, I am your new teacher, my name is Mrudakov. Please pay attention to the letter “r” after the first letter. It must be pronounced clearly and not upset me. Is everyone clear?!
– It’s clear!
– the frightened children shout. At the next physical education lesson, Vovochka wanted to address the teacher, but as luck would have it, he forgot his last name.
– Well, remember!
– says the big man.
– Uh… I just remember that there is a letter “r” after the first one.
– Well…?!?!?!
– says the teacher.
– A! I remembered!!!!
– Khruev!!!

Vovochka asks the teacher at school: “Marya Ivanovna, is it true that everyone in the police is short?”
– Where did you get the idea? “And dad said that all the cops give a damn to him.”