Kids Anecdotes

When in childhood, our parents swore at us, we considered it rudeness, now we ourselves swear at our children and consider it education.

Three children were mixed up in the maternity hospital
– Russian, German and Estonian. An Estonian came
– he looked at the children
– they were absolutely identical
– he didn’t know what to do. A German came and didn’t know what to do. A Russian came and said:
– Guys, calm down, I know what to do… He went into the room, did something there, came out and said:
– This is my child, this one is German, and this one is Estonian.
– How did you determine this? “I said “Hai Hitler,” the German child extended his hand. Mine clenched his fists. And the Estonian crap himself.

During classes in kindergarten, the teacher gave the task to make four vegetables. Vovochka was the last one to turn in his work. He brings a large plate of plasticine, and on it there are many small pieces of plasticine. The teacher asks: “What is this, Vovochka?” Where are your vegetables?
– I’ve already cut them into a salad!

– Vovochka, make up a sentence with the words “cat” and “look.” “When I accidentally stepped on the cat’s paw, he shouted: “You have to watch where you step!”

Americans came to see and learn more about our schools. They walk and look… One of them asked:
– Do you use computers in schools? Ours answer:
– Yes, from first grade. They enter the classroom and see: there are 4 computers standing on the windowsill. The teacher says:
– Sidorov, take 1 computer and put it on the table. Children, how many computers are left on the windowsill?

Students write a dictation. The teacher dictates: “I like to watch the flight of birds…” Oleg asks: “And if I don’t like to watch the flight of birds, should I write too?”

In kindergarten:
– Mom bought me a dress! Guess which one, starting with the letter F!
– Purple?
– No!
– Violet?
– No!
– Well then what?
– Cell!

Carlson and Cheburashka climbed onto the house. Carlson:
– Well, let’s go.
– Oh, wait, let your ears rest a little.

Kindergarten, children star in commercials:
– I am an apricot, I grew up in the south…
– I am a ripe purple garden plum…
– And I am PASSION FRUIT… I don’t even know what to say…