Vovochka Anecdotes

Vovochka and her father are walking down the street. Vovochka:
– Dad, what are the dogs doing there?
– They’re making a puppy. At night, Vovochka comes into her parents’ bedroom and asks: “Dad, what are you doing?”
– We’re making you a brother.
– Turn over and make a puppy.

M.I.
– Children, tell me who your dad is. Masha.
– My dad is a manager. M.I.
– Fine. What else? Vovochka.
– And my dad is a hacker! M.I.
– ? V.
– He was coded three times from drunkenness and broke the code three times.

Vovochka returns from school and says to her parents: “I don’t know why our teacher liked you so much, but she wants to see you again.”

Where did the Armenian radio disappear to?
– We don’t know for sure, but if you have any questions, please contact Sherlock Holmes, Vovochka and Lieutenant Rzhevsky.

Teacher at school:
– Children, what do you think is the most erotic number? Vovochka without hesitation:
– 21593! The teacher is stunned:
– And… why? Vovochka:
– Well, if two people think about the same thing, then at the latest in five weeks they will understand that in nine months there will be three of them!

Teacher:
– Vovochka, tell us what chilling tragic event is depicted in Aivazovsky’s painting “The Ninth Wave”?
– The ninth round of Nikolai Valuev’s boxing match, Marivanna!

Vovochka’s parents didn’t pick him up from kindergarten and the teacher agreed to take him to her home. When they went to bed, Vovochka shouted: “And my mother and I sleep together!” We went to bed together.
– And my mother and I sleep naked! The teacher agreed
– And I poke my mother in the navel with my finger! They lie there for two minutes and suddenly she says: “Vovochka, this is not a belly button!”
– Shut up, fool, it’s not a finger…

Vovochka made a wish.
– I want it to be my birthday every day! “Two months later he grew old and died.

Vovochka to her mother in the morning: “Mom, have you washed your hands?”
– Yes, but what?
– Did you wash it well, with soap?
– Yes, why do you ask?
– Yes, just last night I heard you say to dad:
– Damn, I’ll be crushing this SHIT for a long time?!