Vovochka Anecdotes

The geography teacher points to the globe and says: “Vovochka, find me the North Pole.”
– Nice job, Marivanna! Piri looked and didn’t find him, Cook didn’t find him either, and now I have to find him for you!

In class. Teacher:
– Vovochka, explain to us the theory of relativity. Vovochka:
– Well, look: eggs are boiled at a temperature of 100 degrees Celsius, but in our sauna it was 110
– and everything seemed to be fine!

There’s a lesson in progress. Teacher:
– Vova, tell us who is the chairman of the United Nations? Vovochka:
– Tea Masturban! Teacher:
– Whooo???!!! Vovochka:
– Ugh, fuck! I won’t remember! Coffee Anan, Mary Ivanna!

– Vovochka, don’t go to the disco anymore
– you’ll go deaf!
– Thank you mom, I’ve already eaten.

At school, the teacher scolds Vovochka: “That’s a very bad word.” Where did you hear it?
– My dad says so.
– Don’t you dare repeat it. You don’t know its meaning.
– I know. This means that the car will not start again.

The teacher called Vovochka’s father to school and said: “Your son is absolutely not learning his lessons!” He behaves disgustingly, speaks vulgarities.
– In what sense?
– I asked which animal has the largest eggs and he answered me that an elephant.
– Is this really wrong?
– No! The ostrich has the largest eggs!
– What are you talking about! Is it true? Now I understand why he wrote such sad slow waltzes.

Mary Ivanna:
– Vovochka, in order to achieve anything, you have to study hard! Vovochka:
– Mary Ivanna, you mean how or from whom?….

Vovochka walks along the school corridor and mutters to himself: “Where is the logic? Where is the reason?” The director meets him: “Why aren’t you in class?”
– So they kicked me out of class.
– And for what this time? “I farted in class, and they kicked me out, but they stayed!” So I ask
– where is the logic, where is the reason?

The teacher asks: “Children, who knows where the electricity comes from?” “From the jungle!” Vovochka shouted.
– Why from the jungle? “And when my dad wanted to shave this morning, he exclaimed: “Those monkeys turned off the electricity again!”