VTupchienko35

The children and their teacher took a photo. The teacher convinces everyone to buy a photograph for themselves: “Imagine how great it is!” When you are already adults, look at the photo and say:
– But Mashenka, she is now an actress. And this is Petechka, he is now a doctor… Then Vovochka’s quiet voice was heard from the back desk:
– And this is Mary Ivanovna, she died a long time ago…

Vovochka writes a school essay on the topic “My Dad”: “My dad is the strongest and the bravest! He can swim across the widest river full of crocodiles and piranhas, climb the highest mountain without insurance and fight a bear or lion with his bare hands. But usually he washes the dishes, washes socks and takes out the trash.”

Vovochka’s father meets his neighbor at the entrance and asks: “Have you already done your algebra homework for your son?” “Yes,” the neighbor answers.
– Let me write it off!

The teacher asks a riddle. The student answers, but incorrectly. Teacher:
– Wrong, this is a house. But I like the way of thinking. Vovochka’s turn came:
– Marya Ivanovna, can I ask you a question?
– Can.
– What kind of word consists of three letters, and do you often hold it in your hands?
– Get out of the classroom!
– the teacher shouts.
– Wrong, it’s chalk. But I like the way of thinking.

The teacher complains to her father: “Your Vovochka called me a prostitute.” Father scolds Vovochka: “What is this, ungrateful!”
– Is your teacher teaching you?
– Teaches!
– Takes care of you?
– He cares!
– So what the hell is it your business what she does after work!

In kindergarten.
– What a cute baby! Boy, what’s your name? Vova? Vovochka… What chubby cheeks! How old are you? Vovochka, who do you love more
– dad or mom? Which of the girls do you love more
– Svetochka or Katenka?
– Auntie, please don’t breathe fumes into my face. I am 5 years old. I love dad and mom equally. I also love toys and candy. I will love girls when I grow up. Although the latter, after meeting you, is no longer a fact…

The teacher asks the children:
– Vovochka, what will you be when you grow up?
– Astronaut.
– And you, Vanechka?
– Mathematician.
– And you Petenka?
– Military.
– And you Izya?
– I? An old, grouchy Jew.

Vovochka comes from school and says: “Mom, dad, I think you shouldn’t look at my diary today.” Mom grabs her heart, dad grabs his belt, they open the diary, and there is an A! Everyone is faint. Vovochka (sadly):
– That’s what I was afraid of.

The entire Soviet Union laughed at Vovochka. And Vovochka grew up and became president! And you alone are laughing at the whole country!

Another reason why Putin is our president. His personality combined two favorite joke characters
– Stirlitz and Vovochka.