Explore the best funny anecdotes online – short, witty, and entertaining stories for every mood. Discover popular, classic, and modern anecdotes about life, family, work, and more to make you laugh anytime.
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Explore the best funny anecdotes online – short, witty, and entertaining stories for every mood. Discover popular, classic, and modern anecdotes about life, family, work, and more to make you laugh anytime.
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Alumni meeting. Vovochka meets her classmate:
– Mary Ivanovna, remember when I talked all sorts of bullshit in class?
– Of course I remember, Vladimir Volfovich…
Vovochka:
– How to spell correctly, Maryivanna:
– Ananism or ononism? Teacher:
– Vova, how do you know such words?
– What is there to know? Our whole class is doing this.
– And you too?!
– I don’t-e-e. I have a woman in 1-B.
The teacher writes on the board with colored chalk. Vovochka’s voice from the class:
– Blues can’t see! Teacher:
– Let them change seats!
School. lesson. The topic of the lesson is sayings. MarVanna asks Vovochka:
– Vovochka, what will your tongue lead to???… With the letter K…
– To Kolyma!
Vovochka, as punishment for yet another broken school glass, is forced by the principal to paint all the windows in the school. An hour later, Vovochka enters the director’s office and asks: “Should we paint the frames too?”
MaryIvanna crucifies herself before the fifth “A”:
– What time is this: “he cleans up, she cleans up, you clean up…”? Vovochka, thoughtfully: “It must be New Year’s Eve..!”
Lesson at school, Mary Ivanna asks a treacherous question: “And now, my dears, since we are studying punctuation, please give an example of a sentence in which the location of the comma fundamentally determines its meaning.” Forest of hands.
– Lyudochka, you are our excellent student, I’m listening…
– Execution cannot be pardoned! Silence, Vovochka’s grin, dissatisfied Mary Ivanna:
– Vovochka, is the example naive for you?
– Well, you’re not asking me. “Count it,” she asked.
– Please. A black man enters the room, as if in a fairy tale with a happy ending.
The teacher explains division to the children in class. She wrote “2:2” on the board and asked: “Children, who knows what this means?”
– Draw!
– Vovochka prompts from the back desk.
Teacher:
– Vovochka, don’t move around. Vovochka:
– If you want to live, know how to spin.
Vovochka asks:
– Dad, what does “bride” mean?
– Well, how can I explain it to you… well, let’s say I gave you a bicycle for New Year, it’s now yours, but you’ll only be able to ride it in the summer.
– Well, can we at least play with the buzzer until summer?