Anecdotes

Explore the best funny anecdotes online – short, witty, and entertaining stories for every mood. Discover popular, classic, and modern anecdotes about life, family, work, and more to make you laugh anytime.

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Vovochka teaches lessons. Dad: – Write the hooks more carefully! – Dad, what kin

Vovochka teaches lessons. Dad:
– Write the hooks more carefully!
– Dad, what kind of hooks are these? These are integrals!


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Vovochka stumbles into her parents’ bedroom at the most inopportune moment. Dad

Vovochka stumbles into her parents’ bedroom at the most inopportune moment. Dad was not at a loss and, without getting off his mother’s side, asked his son: “Well, Vovochka.” Who do you want
– a brother or a sister?
– I want a hippopotamus!
– No, Vovochka, a hippopotamus won’t work…
– It won’t work?! … Strange… Let me try, I’ll try it myself!


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“Children,” says the teacher, “Clara Zetkin is a wonderful fighter for women’s e

“Children,” says the teacher, “Clara Zetkin is a wonderful fighter for women’s equality.” Thanks to her, women appeared in our country-cosmonauts, pilots, tractor drivers… “And sleeper layers,” said Vovochka.


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The teacher in the class fell ill. Vovochka was assigned to visit her. The next

The teacher in the class fell ill. Vovochka was assigned to visit her. The next day, Vovochka enters the classroom and announces: “The situation is hopeless!” Mary Vanna will come to school tomorrow!


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“Vovochka,” says the teacher, “name me some transparent object.” – Keyhole, Ivan

“Vovochka,” says the teacher, “name me some transparent object.”
– Keyhole, Ivan Ivanovich!


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— Vovochka. Your diary again has only two grades! What’s your excuse this time?

– Vovochka. Your diary again has only two grades! What’s your excuse this time? “I don’t even know yet: either heredity, or family environment.


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Dad shouts from the window: “Vovochka!” Don’t you dare hit that boy who broke ou

Dad shouts from the window: “Vovochka!” Don’t you dare hit that boy who broke our car window!
– Get away from him now! I can’t aim!


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In an anatomy lesson: – Who can tell what the largest human organ is? Vovochka:

In an anatomy lesson:
– Who can tell what the largest human organ is? Vovochka:
– Ass, Marya Ivanovna: the whole country fits into it.


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Vovochka asks her parents: “What is a blowjob?” Mom shyly: – This is when they t

Vovochka asks her parents: “What is a blowjob?” Mom shyly:
– This is when they take the penis into the mouth… Father:
– What a stupid fool! They don’t take, they give! Damn, we’re raising a son!


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Vovochka came to the zoo, saw monkeys and let’s shout – Mom! Mother ! programmer

Vovochka came to the zoo, saw monkeys and let’s shout
– Mom! Mother ! programmers!
– why did you decide that?
– And they look like dad
– unwashed, shaggy, and they have a sore spot on their butts!


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