The teacher asks: “Mashenka, what did you drive to school today?”
– My dad brought me in a Volkswagen.
– And you, Mishenka, what did you come with?
– My dad brought me to the Audi. In general, it turns out that the parents brought all the children to school by car. Finally it’s Vovochka’s turn, whose parents were not rich. However, Vovochka, who felt sad for his family, suddenly says: “And today my dad brought me in a Mercedes!”
– Why are you late today then?
– Yes, the chain kept slipping off.

Vovochka was invited to visit. They say to him: “Vova, take another piece of cake.”
– Thank you, I have already eaten two pieces.
– Then eat a tangerine.
– Thank you, I have already eaten three tangerines.
– Then take some fruits with you.
– Thank you, I already took it!

The teacher asks the children:
– Misha, who is your dad by profession?
– Lawyer…
– And yours, Leshenka?
– Surgeon…
– And yours, Vovochka?
– Transformer!
– How is that?!
– Well, he gets 380 rubles, gives 160 to his mother, and at 220 he buzzes…

Vovochka comes to school and says to the teacher: “Mar Ivanna!” I won’t study with you anymore
– I’m leaving for America!
– How’s that, Vovochka? Why?
– Yes, a letter has arrived
– my grandfather in America is blind, and he has a farm, two factories, fifteen stores… It’s difficult for him, we need to help.
– And you write to your grandfather to sell everything, transfer the money to the Red Cross, and come here yourself. And we will take patronage over him as a whole class…
– Mary Ivanna, the letter clearly says
– grandfather is blind, and not oh…!

In class. Teacher:
– Vovochka, who is Chapaev?
– This is the leader of the blacks!
– What other blacks?
– Well, you yourself said that he fought against the whites.
– Chapaev is the leader of the Reds!
– What, the Indians were involved there too?

On September 1, Vovochka gave the math student a bouquet of roses, and the Trudovik a “Bouquet of Moldova.”

Vovochka’s parents have gone to bed, and Vovochka is listening at the door. “Darling, I would like a girl,” says mom.
– Okay, you will have a girl. Vovochka, bursting into the room:
– And for me
– a saber, Budenovka, Snickers and a bicycle.

– Vovochka, give an example of a verbless sentence.
– My aunt is a prostitute.
– What are these words? March to the director! At recess, everyone surrounds Vovochka, and he eats an apple as if nothing had happened.
– Vovochka, did you get it? What did the director tell you?
– The director gave me an apple and asked for my aunt’s address.

Vovochka brought home a boomerang just now… Dad started to throw it away.

During the lesson, Vovochka asks the teacher:
– Mary Ivanna, name a six-letter word that is used to describe complete collapse and failure, the second letter is “i“? Teacher:
– Get out of class! Vovochka (coming out):
– Fiasco, Mary Ivanna, fiasco.