Vovochka:
– During a chemistry lesson, our teacher mixed a blue liquid with a red one and got green. “We thought she was a witch and burned her.”

Vovochka, entering the kitchen and seeing a bag of caramels on the table, immediately ate them all. After a while, his little sister comes in and starts whining: “You ate all the candy and didn’t even remember me!”
– How did you not remember this? Why did I eat them all so quickly then?

– Vovochka, you need to cover your mouth with your hand when you cough. “Don’t be afraid, grandma, my teeth won’t fall out like yours did the day before yesterday.”

– Vovochka, where did you hear this terrible word?
– From Santa Claus.
– Can’t be!
– Maybe! He said it when Petka hit him in the eye with a snowball!

At a Russian language lesson, after writing a dictation, Marvanna asks Vovochka: “Vovochka, why are there so many gaps in your dictation?”
– You see, Marvanna, this is all a place for advertising…

Chemistry lesson, topic
– iron, at the blackboard
– Vovochka. Marvanna asks: “Tell me, what is the process of iron corrosion?”
– Iron becomes covered with rust.
– Can you write the reaction equation?
– I can’t…
– What does rust consist of?
– I don’t know…
– Okay, let’s go together. Write Fe(OH)3…
– Vovochka writes on the board:
– FeOFeOFeO.
– Horror ! What did you write here?
– They themselves said FeO… three times…

Little Vovochka watches his dad paint the ceiling. Mom tells him: “Look, Vovochka, and learn, you’ll grow up and help dad.”
– What, he won’t finish painting himself by then?

The teacher asks Vovochka: “What does India import into our country?” Vovochka:
– I don’t know. Teacher:
– Well, think about it, remember what you and your family drink in the morning? Vovochka:
– What, is it really a pickle?!

Marya Ivanovna calls Vovochka to the board and writes the task: 6+3*7=? Vovochka hesitated for five minutes and said: “I don’t know…” “A bad mark and you stay for the second year!”
– Marya Ivanovna, let’s do this: if you don’t solve my problem, then give me a 3 with a minus, and if you do, then so be it
– I’ll stay for the second year!
– Am I the one who won’t solve your problem?! Let’s!
– The mechanic brought home 4 valves, the carpenter
– 3 planes, and the electrician
– 16 light bulbs. How much did they get together?
– 23!
– Wrong! Together they have 6 years of strict regime!

Russian language lesson at school in Vovochki. The teacher says: “Today we will make riddles about what letters are in the word, and we will guess others.”
– Guess the word
– there is a letter “x”, the second is “y”, ends in “nya”.
– Are you being a bully again?
– What’s wrong, I thought of the word “kitchen”.