Vovochka asks: “Mom, why is dad bald?”
– And he is very smart!
– Why do you have so much hair?
– Shut up and eat…

Dad asks Vovochka when he came home: “What grades did you get at school today?”
– Two in physical education… After a SPECIFIC thrashing, dad asks:
– And for what? Vovochka:
– The teacher says:
– Raise your left leg, then raise your right leg… Father (with great surprise):
– So what the hell should you stand for? Vovochka (downcast):
– I asked the same thing….

Mom:
– Vovochka, why did you hit your sister with a chair?
– Because I couldn’t lift the chest of drawers.

Vovochka comes to the store:
– Give me a bottle of vodka.
– I won’t give it. Still small.
– Well, dad sent me.
– Well, he sent me and what, should I get drunk because of this?

At school, during a geography lesson, the teacher asks the class: “Where will we end up if we drill the ground at the equator?”
– To a madhouse!
– Vovochka answers.

Marya Ivanovna returns the diary to Vovochka and says: “Your father will turn gray when he sees your diary.”
– He won’t turn gray.
– Don’t he care about your grades?
– Of course, they are worried, but he is bald.

– Vovochka? name two pronouns.
– Who, me?
– Well done, five.

During a math lesson, Vovochka is asked the following questions: “What is 3 plus 4?”
– 9.
– And 11 plus 5?
– 22.
– You seem to be doing a bad job. Who’s your dad?
– The waiter
– he taught me.

– What’s wrong with your hand?
– they ask Vovochka.
– They took blood from a finger.
– Why is she in your cast?
– But I didn’t give it.

According to the terms of the reality show, each participant could take only 1 thing with them to the island. Vanya took the book, Petya took the tape recorder, Vasya took the computer, and Vovochka took the rubber woman… And a month later he had a book, a tape recorder and a computer…