A very furry grandmother, she knits clothes for her grandchildren from her own wool.

A hare runs through the forest, and a hunter follows him. The hunter took aim and shot off the hare’s hind legs. The hare crawls further on its front legs. The hunter shot them off for him and his ears to boot. The hare was not at a loss
– he crawls further, gnawing his teeth into the ground. The hunter took aim and knocked out the hare’s teeth, and the hare turns to the hunter and says: “Well, why did you come after me?!”

Vandals covered a monument to a copulating bestiality with obscene inscriptions.

Mister Proper washed everything, but infected everyone with the plague, Mister Proper! PS: Procter&Gamble apologizes for the batch of “Mr. Proper” with the plague strain.

– I’m funny, kill me last.

A woman walks without an ear, and on her forehead she has a tattoo: “Kolya took a bite.” Everyone asks her: “Where is the ear?”
– Kolya took a bite – Why the tattoo? – Yes, it’s a damn thing to answer for.

The husband returns from a business trip, and the wife and her lover… Anecdotal, at first glance, the situation ended in a stabbing.

What a misfortune! Andryukha went swimming drunk one night and hanged himself.

– What will you write on your grave?
– At first – nothing. Then I will periodically rise from the dead, write something new on the tombstone and crawl back down like a decent necro-blogger.

– Gentlemen of the jury! This man promised to marry me, but chose another woman. He broke my heart and I am demanding ten thousand dollars in damages! And she received the required amount. Next case: “About causing bodily harm to a woman.” A car ran over the plaintiff and broke three of her ribs. Court decision: pay three hundred dollars in compensation. Moral: don’t break women’s hearts, hit them in the ribs!