Explore the best funny anecdotes online – short, witty, and entertaining stories for every mood. Discover popular, classic, and modern anecdotes about life, family, work, and more to make you laugh anytime.
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Explore the best funny anecdotes online – short, witty, and entertaining stories for every mood. Discover popular, classic, and modern anecdotes about life, family, work, and more to make you laugh anytime.
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Vovochka comes home: “Dad, something happened at our school today that your salary won’t be enough!”
Teacher in a physics lesson:
– We take an ebonite stick, put it in an ebonite glass… Vovochka:
– Isn’t it ebonite?
– Aunt Tanya, will Vovochka go outside?
– Yes, in half an hour, he’s putting away the toys now. “In half an hour we’ll be gone.”
– Vovochka, why were you kicked out of class?
– I am a class enemy.
One day the school principal calls Vovochka and says: “Don’t be ashamed of you, Vovochka!” You’re in transition! Your voice just started to break!
– So what? The voice began to break, but the pioneer leader stopped!
– Vovochka!
– says the mother to her young son.
– Should you buy a sister or brother?
– Do you have money?
– he asks.
– Eat!
– Mom answers.
– Then you better go to the doctor!
The son says to his mother: “I won’t go to school anymore!”
– Why is this?
– Come on… Petrov will shoot with a slingshot again, Sinitsyn will hit the head with a textbook, Vasiliev will trip him up… I won’t go!
– No, Vovochka, you have to go. Firstly, you are already forty years old, and secondly, you are a school director.
Vovochka is walking on the street with her mother. Suddenly, my mother’s friend comes towards them. After they greeted each other, mom says: “Vovochka, kiss your aunt.”
– I won’t!
– Vovochka, I said, kiss your aunt!
– I won’t and that’s it!!!
– What’s the matter, Vovochka, why don’t you want to kiss your aunt? “She slapped dad on the cheek for this yesterday!”
The teacher says:
– Children, the holiday is coming
– March 8th, write some poem about this. Vovochka gets up and says: “March Eighth is close, close.” Grow up quickly, my pussy. Teacher:
– Out!!! Go to the director and tell me why I kicked you out! He comes to the director, saying that he was kicked out for a poem dedicated to March 8th. The director listened to the poem and said: “You’re a fool, this is the kind of poem you need to compose: “March 8th is close, close, and my heart is beating like a deer, don’t let me down, honey, on International Women’s Day!”
The teacher asks Vovochka: “Vovochka, why didn’t you do your homework?”
– I worked, Maria Ivanovna. Wash Mercedes.
– How I sympathize with you, Vovochka…
– Eh, Maria Ivanovna, since I bought Mercedes, where will you go now?