Dictation at school. The teacher dictates: “The crocodile came out of the river and rushed onto the wet pebbles… The whole class (except Vovochka, of course) wrote “pebbles” with a capital letter. Such vulgarities!!!
– Vovochka, explain to these poor students why you wrote “pebble” with a small letter?
– And after the crocodile, I don’t even consider her a person…

Vovochka comes running to her father: “Dad!” Really, you won’t be upset?
– It depends on what.
– Yes, I spilled your coffee.
– Bullshit!
– That’s what I mean! But your computer doesn’t seem to think so: i.e. Now he doesn’t even think!!!

The teacher asks the students:
– Stand up, those who consider themselves stupid. After a long pause, Vovochka stood up.
– Do you really think you’re stupid?
– Well, not really. It’s just somehow inconvenient that you’re standing alone.

At a geography lesson.
– Vovochka, aren’t you ashamed? At your age, I already knew all the countries!
– So this is not surprising, Mary Ivanna, there were only two or three of them at that time.

Vovochka asks the teacher:
– Mary Ivanna, at what age do donkeys die?
– Why are you asking about this, Vovochka? Feeling bad?

The teacher takes Vovochka home from kindergarten, and he tells her what’s happening on the street: “There’s Masha looking out the window, and there’s Petka digging in the sandbox, and there’s the dogs fucking.”
– Vovochka, is it possible to express yourself like that
– it’s obscene, do you know how it’s done in life?
– How?
– The top gets tense, and the bottom relaxes, so do you understand how this applies to our lives?
– Yeah!
– Well, what did you understand? “Yes, he says, we can’t relax in our life, otherwise they’ll fuck you like a dog!”

– Vovochka, why are you sniffing glue?
– Grandma, this was assigned to us at home due to work.

Teacher:
– Vovochka name 2 pronouns. Vovochka:
– Who? I? Teacher:
– That’s right, Vovochka.

Marivanna to the fifth “A”: “So, who can tell me what time it is?” He cleans, she cleans, you clean… Vovochka:
– I think it’s just before New Year’s.

The teacher draws a triangle on the board and asks Vovochka:
– What angle is this
– acute, straight or obtuse? Vovochka is in a stupor. Petya prompts: “Same as you!” Vovochka joyfully:
– This corner is STEP!